Alcoholics - How Drinking Causes Disassociation in Your Relationships

There is a theory floating around among doctors thatmakes life and challenges feel better. That along with
are knowledgeable about alcoholism that alcoholism isthe biological wiring to respond in a very positive way
caused by a traumatic experience in the alcoholic's lifeto substances makes addiction all but a sure thing.
when he or she was very young that caused them toSo the alcoholic feels "messed up" and doesn't
feel in serious danger and caused the alcoholic to feelunderstand why his or her relationships aren't working
helpless. This trauma created in the alcoholic theout. They use alcohol to regulate their emotions, i.e.,
inability to process feelings and the inability to trustthey drink to handle emotions that are too big and too
others. In other words, what caused the alcoholic tounpleasant for them. And in relationships, since they
become addicted to alcohol is the same set ofhave trust issues, some can experience feelings of
problems that make maintaining relationships difficult.great discomfort and panic when they feel a
This trauma resulted in what's called disassociation.relationship is getting too intimate.
This is where you cut yourself off from your feelingsThe problem is that drinking to deal with emotions has
and from others and isolate yourself at least on anleft those emotions unchanged since you started using
emotional level. The theory goes on to say that it wasand drinking has impaired your emotional development.
at the time of this trauma that you stopped developingThat's probably why there is a common phrase that
the part of your brain that regulates emotions.you are at the emotional level you were at when you
What's the result? The alcoholic tends to have a hardstarted using. If you started using at the age of 14,
time with relationships. You can't trust someone elseallegedly that's the emotional level you currently
with your feelings and so cannot maintain a genuineoperate at.
relationship. The alcoholic feels he or she is puttingThis is one reason why alcoholics have such a hard
themselves in danger by exposing their feelings andtime quitting. You no longer have the buffer to keep
risking further harm.your feelings at bay and if you want success in your
The alcoholic unknowingly looking for a solution to thisrelationships, you have to learn to trust others again. It
problem actually sets the stage for addiction. Drinkingtakes courage to make that kind of beginning.