| How do you really help an alcoholic or drug addict? | | | | Don't let guilt drag you down. You're no good to |
| Maybe you have a spouse, friend or child that is in the | | | | anyone if you're swimming in your own sea of misery |
| throws of an addiction. What do you do, how do you | | | | and guilt. You need to stay strong and be a tower of |
| really help? There aren't any hard and fast rules, but | | | | strength. |
| here are 5 tips that may help ... | | | | 4.) Forgive |
| 1.) Communicate | | | | Realize that being an alcoholic or drug addict isn't who |
| It's an old cliche, but there really is tremendous power | | | | that person really is. That doesn't excuse their |
| in open and honest communication. To really express | | | | behavior, but realize that at their core they're a good |
| how your spouses, friends, child's addiction is effecting | | | | person despite what they've done. So becoming |
| you and them, you begin to plant the seeds of how | | | | hateful and resentful doesn't do anyone any good, |
| much damage they're actually doing. Change may not | | | | least of all you. Anger, Hatred and Resentment only |
| happen immediately, but you just don't know when that | | | | poison your own psyche and soul, no one else's, and |
| seed will be ready to ripen. By the way - threatening, | | | | there's absolutely nothing positive you'll be able to do if |
| aggressive or abusive behavior isn't the answer either | | | | you're coming from such a negative space. Don't |
| - but we'll talk about tough love later. | | | | forget to forgive yourself as well because you're |
| 2.) Let the Addict Own their Stuff | | | | bound to feel some kind of responsibility - even if you |
| What do I mean by that? Don't play protector, cover | | | | shouldn't. Forgiveness has the power to heal the most |
| up for, or bail out the addict of the inevitable jams that | | | | painful of wounds. |
| person finds him/herself in. An alcoholic or drug addict | | | | 5.) Don't be afraid to Practice Tough Love |
| has to learn to take responsibility for what they're | | | | This ties in with allowing the addict to be responsible |
| doing. What help is it to them if you're constantly bailing | | | | for their actions. Enabling their behavior by always |
| them out? Only by being forced to take responsibility | | | | covering up for them or bailing them out does them |
| do they begin to feel the consequences of their | | | | absolutely no good. True love is allowing them to learn |
| actions. Consequences create change. | | | | their lessons no matter how painful. Tough love isn't |
| 3.) Don't Take Anything Personally | | | | ranting or raving - you make sure your actions speak |
| What's the first thing we tend to do - blame ourselves. | | | | louder than words. You begin to create serious |
| Their drinking or drugging has nothing to do with you so | | | | consequences of that persons continuous drinking or |
| don't blame yourself. We're each accountable for our | | | | drugging - e.g. they go to rehab or else you're kicking |
| own stuff, responsible for our own actions. So despite | | | | them out - will communicate how serious the situation |
| what that person may say don't fall into the | | | | has become and that the time for action has arrived. |
| blame-shame game. Ultimately only the addict can help | | | | Performing an Intervention can be a very powerful tool |
| him/herself. It's not something you can do for them. | | | | to use. |